As someone with chronic pain, I feel like I’m always trying to get people to understand me and my life. And most of the time, even after I try explaining it all, they still don’t understand.
A few weeks ago I was chatting with a friend and one of their friends (that I’ve known for a while) asked me how I was doing. On this particular day, I was not doing great at all. My pain had been so high the days before. I decided that instead of hiding my experiences, I would tell the truth. “Honestly, I’m doing really shitty,” I told him. His response was to say “Oh” and then change the topic. And this is how it normally goes when I tell someone that I have chronic pain, they don’t know how to respond so they don’t respond at all. The result is me feeling like no one cares enough to provide the support I really need.
A few days ago, I saw on my Timehop that a year ago I posted on Facebook venting about the pain I was in. A good friend of mine commented supporting me through this pain. Now, the same person doesn’t even text me to ask me how I’m doing. In fact, the only time I ever talk to this person is when I need to get more weed so I can get some relief from constant pain.
I think most people think I’m just lazy and over-exaggerate the pain I’m in. Trust me, I would love it if my pain just went away and I was able to do all the things I can’t right now. No one with chronic pain is happy that they have to lay around the house day after day.
Unruly Bodies 
I admire you for being so open about something that seem to really hit home for you. The truth is no one really knows how to react to someone else’s pain. It’s like dealing with death. When someone tells you they lost a loved one, and then you say ” I’m sorry for your lost,” because being being sorry always seems to be the right thing to say. I think often times we struggle to find how to react “the right way” when it comes to something very sensitive like physical pain, death, rape, racism ect… When we say things like, “I’m sorry to hear that,” “sorry for your lost,” or “my prayers goes out to you,” these are all ways for us to show empathy for others.But I think the real question is how much do we really mean these things. What are we really being sorry for? How many times have we actually prayed for those people we’ve told “my prayers goes out to you.” Most of us are way too concerned worrying about our own pain then someone else’s. We might show that we care for that particular moment and then that’s it. And I think because you’re dealing with chronic pain, it’s easier for people to be indifferent or dismissive towards you. I think people view chronic pain as, “pain is pain,” there is no inbetween which explains why the person you were chatting with showed no type of regard or care when you said you were feeling shitty. I personally have no idea what chronic pain is like, but the way you speak about your story, and are so vocal about it, tells me that you are a strong person and way far from lazy 🙂