Coping with the sense of dread that comes around finals takes a toll on the body similarly, but different, of doing physical work.

I never have truly felt content with my work by the end of each semester, a lot of stressors always come around from my home life with family, or I somehow injure myself in some way which makes it harder to work with my head. I’m heavily prone to accidents, super clumsy, and for somehow every single semester since I’ve started attending college, I’ve had to deal with a negative family situation in which I lose my focus for classes throughout a time frame of a week to a month at times. A month for us is literally a third of the semester and of our work we do for our classes. I’ve always felt it was difficult to explain my situation to professors, normally because I fear to ask for any sort of help. By the time I build up just enough courage to ask, it tends to be at the end of the semester, where I’m scrambling to pick up the pieces of what I can do, from what has been assigned and the finals themselves. This has made my body extremely fatigued, and always within the last few weeks of the semester. Maybe I should consider part-time classes? I’ve thought of that before, but ironically I prefer the busy schedule so I can stay out of my family’s house as much as possible. So with any finals that are papers, I tend to stare at the drafts for a lengthy amount of time, barely completing some within the deadline, turning them in late, or not turning anything at all. Ends with me either completely desensitized to the bad grades that may come up into my class history or in such complete stress it incapacitates me. At this point, I just have to go with what I got, and I don’t know how that’ll turn out in the end but I hope I at least make it out of here with the diploma somehow in time, with my body still surviving.