What’s that disability? (Pokemon sounds)
So to preface this blog post, background is required. I was homeschooled for the entirety of my life before college. I participated in some classes out of the house with kids my age at various homeschool groups, but my main learning was done at home. However, I’ve always had a rough time with school work. When I was younger I was far sighted and couldn’t see anything up close which took my family a while to figure out. I couldn’t remember things well and my attention span was next to nothing.
My mom tried her hardest with me every single day and year by year I got better. I could remember things easier, I could pay attention for longer periods of time, and things were going well. Thanks to her hard work, I graduated high school with a good GPA and got accepted into UMBC.
Now that I’m on my own here, I realize that my study habits and practices are a bit off…. I have a very hard time focusing on activities for more than 20 minutes at a time, and to help myself pay attention in class, I usually listen to music. I am realizing more and more that my inattention and study habits (or lack thereof) are not commonplace. This has made this semester at UMBC so much harder than my other ones. As more is required of me, I find I need to lock in for longer amounts of time and it has really been a struggle. I realize that there is a good chance that I have ADHD in some form and maybe if I was public schooled, they would have caught it early. There is also a chance that they would have just put me in lower difficulty classes and I wouldn’t be where I am today.
I say all this to say that support was everything for me. Without my mom’s undying efforts and my family’s everlasting support, I would not have made it to where I am today, nonexistent attention span or not. I’m going to have to work harder to get through my remaining semesters in college, and I’m just happy I have my support system behind me every step of the way.
Unruly Bodies 
I understand a lot of how you feel. I suspect that I also have undiagnosed ADHD, and still struggle figuring out how to balance the time I need to get the amount of work done versus the time that I am given by professors. Your post reminds me of the accommodation discussion we had in class, and how professors (or the education as an institution, to be honest) tend to not consider attention deficit disabilities like ADHD when making assignments and setting deadlines – and how people have to jump through hoops not only to get a diagnosis but to get the proper accommodations from the school after that diagnosis. It makes me happy to read that you have so much support from your mom though, and I wish you luck on the rest of your time in academia 🙂
It is a difficult situation when going to public school could have given you the chance to get diagnosed sooner but being home schooled could be why you are where you are today. This idea is due to the fact that public schools often allow kids to be left behind in certain aspects of schooling and doesn’t focus on the individual. It is great that you had your mom and the rest of your family to support you in your schooling and help get you to where you are today.
Hello,
It’s difficult to distinguish between expericing stress and maybe having ADHD, especially for people who have imposter syndrome and tend to suppress. I’m glad you have the immediate support system you deserve. Getting a diagnosis would help a lot. I hope you know you are not in the boat alone, as many people can struggle and people need people so reaching out to others may be very beneficial.