I think that being able to have a child is amazing. I believe that children are amazing and wonderful blessings. I believe mothers are there to love their children to the fullest. I also believe that I don’t think I want to have children. I am not sure to be honest, I am still young and have a lot to think about before that happens but I don’t think that I want to go through all that pain and what I truly see as torment. A lot of people, especially mothers will tell you that all the pain goes away once you see the baby. However, even though I never went through it. I find it very hard to believe that’s the truth. That birth is just painless after the fact. I think this also goes into the fact that mothers want other women to be moms as well. I think our society in general thinks women are just moms waiting to happen if it didn’t already.
I told my mother one day that I think having children is scary and sucks for the mother’s body. And she said that I will get over it and it doesn’t make sense to not want a kid. She said when I am older, I will want like 10. Then as I got older I decided I wanted to adopt because I want to be able to give a home to kids who don’t have one and she said…no…you will want your own first. I told her the adopted kids are mine and she said no they are not. It’s almost as if being a mother isn’t even enough. I must go through the process of pregnancy and birth to be deemed important or a real mother. Which makes no sense at all.
Also as a woman until you give birth and are pregnant do you learn all the terrible things that can possibly happen during birth. Like I did not know that your vagina can rip all the way to your anus or clit during birth. That is so crazy. I also did not know about the “after birth” which is sometimes more painful than the real thing. I just don’t find any of this appealing and the fact we don’t learn this in school, suggests that they dont want us to know the terrible, messy things. So that women will choose to reproduce and have more kids. I heard someone write they would rather regret not having children at all, than regret having them and I can not agree enough.
Unruly Bodies 
Hello, First of all, it is very sad that your mother thinks that a women is considered a mother if they experience child birth and I agree that this makes no sense at all. Some people think that the only real way to have children is through childbirth by a women which is such an ignorant thing to say. I am a homosexual man and I have people tell that I am not going to able to have to kids in the future since I will not be in a relationship with a women. There is nothing wrong with wanting to adopt a child and claim is as your own. It is your life and people should what is best or comfortable for them. I am not a women but I too I heard many stories about complications that can happen during childbirth and the pain is intolerable for a human. I think child birth is beautiful thing, but I do think people should think about some of the negative possibilities that could happen even if it is a small chance of it happening. Thank you for this post by the way and I hope one day your mom becomes more understanding of your decision.
I also agree with the idea that it is better to regret not having children at all than regret having children because in the first situation a child does not have to be involved and potentially be mistreated due to a decision their parent made. Many of aspects of childbirth are not well known by the average person. It is important for people to know this information so that they can made well informed decisions about what happens in their life and to their body.
With the way that birth control and contraception are constantly being threatened by removal, I think pregnancy is being forced upon society. Many of us are just not ready and know we wouldn’t be in the best condition to be parents but it seems like being a mother is necessary according to politicians and men around the world, it’s scary honestly. Your post was amazing and actually reminded me of these TikToks I’ve seen floating around where someone created a list of all the reasons why they wouldn’t get pregnant. If that’s not free contraception then I don’t know what is.
It’s sad to see history taking this course. I correlate this to the electoral college, where the positions can differ from the popular vote. In this situation, few people are talking for many. I understand your perspective on betting to regret not having children so I think that’s why I chose my compromise by first fostering children and then eventually adopting.