I recently came across a Youtube video entitled “Shrinking Women,” which is a piece of slam poetry written and performed by Lily Myers. It discusses the topic of bodies and the space they take up. I found this piece to be profound and it immediately reminded me of this course.
The different amounts of space that men and women are socialized to feel entitled to take up is something that often goes ignored. It is seen as natural that women should be small and meek, while men grow to take up the space that is left behind. The self and the body are inextricably linked in this context, as women are taught that their self-worth is tied up in how much space they occupy. Both physically and mentally: women are encouraged to diet until they physically shrink (“I wonder if my lineage is one of women shrinking”), as well as apologize for the space they occupy intellectually (“I asked five questions in genetics class today, and all of them started with the word ‘sorry’”). This piece helps illustrate how women are taught to shrink and apologize in order to live in this world, while men are allowed to grow big and boisterous and occupy the space that women vacate.
This video is an important reminder of how gendered bodies are socialized to work in space differently. Although it seems like a simple and innocuous act, the space that we feel we are entitled to take up plays an important role in teaching men and women whether they are considered important enough to have their voices heard and their bodies recognized.
Unruly Bodies 
I think the topic of how much space women are allowed to occupy mentally is a really fascinating issue that does not receive enough attention. I completely commiserate with her on the apologetic nature that accompanies my acting as though I am entitled to take up space in an intellectual setting, and I often find myself second-guessing my intellectual self-worth. In fact, instead of apologizing for taking up space in my classes, I often just don’t take up any space at all; I simply don’t say anything because I believe my thoughts aren’t worthy of time and attention. Until watching this video, it had never crossed my mind that I had been socialized to act this way, though. I thought that this reaction was simply a manifestation of my shyness, not of socially conditioned gender roles.
Liz Myers’ piece is really powerful! I definitely agree that the amount of space we take up as women and men alike is not discussed enough. Before watching her performance, I actually had a totally different perspective on the matter. I thought of the space our bodies occupy as something we just do without thinking. It is so ingrained in our culture for men to take more and women to expect less, so inherently, women would not allow themselves to take up as much space as a man. But after seeing this piece, I realize that the space our bodies occupy is totally something that is learned. If we didn’t have people around us- our parents and our elders- showing us how a woman is “supposed” to take up space versus how a man is supposed to, we might not feel the need to limit our size or our reach at all. Very poignant.
This piece is really moving and powerful to me. I’m impressed not only by her words but her ability to perform in a way that emphasizes her meaning. It’s a personal poem but it’s so relatable; I think many women have this same anxiety over filling space, being too big, and especially feeling like they have to apologize when they impose on others. I know for me at least the part about asking questions in class and starting all of them with “sorry” really struck home. I struggle to own my own presence and sometimes I feel like I’m a nuisance for others or like I’m stepping on their toes, even when that’s clearly not the case. It’s important to see works like this that point out our assumptions of how our bodies should be treated and entitled and make us think a little harder about where and why we place ourselves.
This piece is so powerful. I never really thought deeply about the amount of space I take up physically until moving closer to a city. When I started riding the city bus I became super aware of how small I tried to make myself to accommodate other people (particularly men) and how little this was reciprocated by them. The way this poet described taking up space mentally also really, really resonated with me. It really is interesting, like communistdaughters mentioned, how these actions are socially conditioned, but we often believe their root is something personal.
I loved this video – incredible performance, powerful words. One of the things I thought was interesting was the conflation of size and power. Taking up space is a way of asserting ourselves. By shrinking, we are often giving up power. By spending so much time and energy restricting ourselves and apologizing, we’re losing power. I think one of the reasons I loved this performance is because of the way that Lily is fighting back against shrinking – she may be a relatively small person, but she is on stage, taking up space both physically and verbally. I loved it. Thank you for posting!