Why is it so wrong for a body to be alone during a meal time? Why does a body have to be around other people during meals? It might seem strange but I have always enjoyed the occasional “out to eat with myself” for breakfast lunch or dinner.
One time I went to Waffle House for breakfast, since my boyfriend isn’t a morning person I decided to go alone. When I got there the perky little seventeen something hostess asked how many. I said one. Her demeanor changed from chipper to confused, to sympathetic as she led me to my corner table. As I was ordering she asked if anyone else will be eating breakfast with me for the second time I said no, just me. She asked me why go out when you are not meeting anyone. I replied “I enjoy eating by myself from time to time. Then I don’t have to worry about meaningless small talk or comfortable silences. It is some time for myself” after my little chat with her she left me to get my pancakes I pulled out a book and started to do homework. I got my food, she refilled me coffee more times that I needed, I left her a nice tip and I left.
I don’t understand why a person needs to eat around other people all the time. It may be a pack mentality, where we need to strive for a sense of belonging as we down greasy burgers and french fries. I have no idea why eating solo was a big deal for my waitress that day but it just got me thinking why we view someone as lonely, sad, standoffish, bitchy,or depressed when they choose to have some time for themselves.
Whew, well that felt good to vent.
Unruly Bodies 
This is really interesting, since eating with others can also be accompanied by more problems-feelings of insecurity of how much one is eating, or whether or not the right type of conversation is going on. Its a challenge and an accomplishment to truly enjoy your own company-and part of the challenge comes from others looking down on it.
It’s funny–I used to be very judgmental about people who ate alone. I always found it very sad and lonely looking. That is, until I started going to get lunch on my own. You’re right about no need for small talk or chit chat, and there is something very fulfilling about realizing that you can have just a fine time by yourself. Nowadays, getting a nice lunch and sitting outside by myself to think is something I look forward to. You need to become your own friend sometimes, and space away can be just what the doctor ordered.
This is so crazy because i use to think that my cousin was crazy when she said she would go on dinner dates with herself and she would just go to a restaurant by herself and sit down. That is something I could never do because I would feel like people are staring at me. I don’t know if I ever go out to eat I have to have a male presence unless I’m with my mother. For some reason when I go to lunch with a female friend people just assume were dating…ummm NO! I think it’s just something that really annoys me. But hey if you enjoy lunch by yourself then people should do just that!
I work in a restaurant so I have noticed the variety of responses people have towards diners eating alone. When we seat people we are never allowed to say “oh, only one?” or “just one today?” because our boss feels that including the “only” or “just” emphasizes and even belittles that the person is eating alone. I’ve also noticed that conversation is such an important part of the dining experiences for many people, the interaction between different bodies while fueling your own body is seen throughout cultures. Food is often associated with social interactions and celebrations. I’ve noticed that for the most part, people eating alone are usually doing something else at the same time, whether its reading a book, doing work on a computer, or making phone calls. In many ways they aren’t actually “alone.” I think its strange that eating solo makes so many uncomfortable considering our society really emphasizes individualism and independence.
I absolutely love going places alone. I’m the definition of an introvert through and through, so having my own company in the corner of a coffee shop, café, or any public space really, is comforting to me. It allows me to go at my own pace, and I don’t have to make exhausting small talk with acquaintances. Plus, travelling around on my own gives me a sense of independence, which I particularly enjoy. Sometimes I will bring some work with me, but most of the time, I just need to get out of my parents’ house for a bit to relax and take some time for myself.
This is my first semester at UMBC and for the first week I starved myself because I was scared to go in the dining room and eat alone because I feared people thinking I was that lonely girl with no friends. The second week my RA brought me there to eat and the following day I went alone and as expected people stirred at me. It was the most uncomfortable moment of my life. All these groups laughing I just sat there pretending to text. I hate that feeling and its funny cause when I see people eating alone I do the same thing I start judging them as lonely. I know now thyat this is not the case because sometimes I do eat alone when my friends have class and I just need a snack I sit alone and I know I am being judged as that girl with no friends. I honestly believe that most people eat in groups because they fear being judged.