How do you meet someone new without automatically labeling them and them labeling you? We create these labels and categorize people into them, even if we do not tell them that we are categorizing them. Everyone does it, whether they realize they are doing it or not. Labels make it easy to remember someone, but it also makes it easy to forget that the people we are labeling are more than just the box we put them in. I don’t want one thing to define me. I am more than that. I am more than just what meets the eye. Because I don’t want to be known as “that girl”. No one wants to be known as “that girl”. But we let one trait define people. It’s an easy way to remember who they are. We use their physical traits, or one specific thing that they did or said, whether good or bad to remember who they are. And that’s what sticks. It how we describe the person to others. “that girl with the red hair”. I know that’s how all my teachers remember me, how my peers remember me. It’s an easy descriptor. Something that stands out, controls who I am. They’ll remember my red hair before they remember my name. And it’s fine for people to remember me in that way. It’s the first thing that people notice about me. I’ll always be easy to spot in a crowd, easy to pick out. That is not a big deal. But it’s the perceptions that people create that come along with it. As crazy as it sounds, people create this idea of who I am as a person, just based on the color hair I have. They think that my hair color is what makes my personality, how I act. I have many people ask me disgusting and creepy questions that I would wish I never heard come out of their mouth. I shouldn’t have to worry about how people define me, as my opinion about myself should be the only one that matters, but when there are so many people that come up to you and expect a certain thing just by the way you look, it makes you question your worth. And my label is just based off of my hair color. I know that their labels are far worse. They have worse perceptions, and have much judgment and hate surrounded by them. So, even if labels make us remember people and make it easier to be apart or something, are labels really good?
Unruly Bodies 
I can most certainly relate to you when saying labels are just an easy way to define a person the way you’d think they would want to be defined. Just because of the color of your hair has no relation to being queer/bi/straight or even meaning that you like the color that you chose to put on your head! Labels leave massive gaps of misunderstanding and blatant biases that only form stereotypes and potentially negative opinions. You are beyond what people say! Thanks for sharing!
I relate to this. Often times, when I was younger, I would be called upon as the smart kids, because I was a Chinese kid with glasses. The truth is, I was just studious and remembered facts better than most. I chafed at the preconceptions, and I wanted to be viewed as my own person, independent of my race. People can’t help but use labels, because they are forms of identifications so that they can be easily categorized. It’s how homeless people are avoided, because they are seen as suffering the consequences of their own actions, rather than external factors that have led them to such a fate. it’s honestly sickening with the lack of empathy given to people. They put you in boxes without your knowledge, and get mad at you for acting of it.
I can understand what you mean when you say that “We create these labels and categorize people into them, even if we do not tell them that we are categorizing them.”. How you present yourself from what the color of your hair is to the clothes you where shouldn’t be the deciding factor of what your sexual orientation is or if you are neurotypical or not. It is unfair to the person’s identity can feel like it is also erasing it as well.
I can honestly say I am guilty of labeling others. Growing up I would constantly make assumptions about people I meet or strangers I walk past. Whether they were rude or complimentary comments. It would always make me feel terrible when I finally get to know someone after developing such prejudice labels about someone. Now I just hope and remind myself to realize that people are not defined by their outward appearance, and to be more open to how another person might feel about my labels of them.
I too have experienced both labeling others an getting labeled. It is so difficult to overcome, since society has repeatedly instilled this kind of mindset of putting people into categories they may not necessarily fit into or feel comfortable being put into. However, because I myself do not prefer label, the process of stepping away from labeling others has been eye opening. By just talking to individuals, learning of their experiences, and seeing who they truly are, labels then become null and not important in the least because I now understand these individuals enough to not stereotype or label them. I now no longer make assumptions of others, and at the same time do not pay any mind to those who wish to label me or the assumed labels I am given altogether. Hopefully, more people will have the mindset of getting to know people first before setting these labels upon them in the future.
Lovely thought-provoking piece!! I definitely fall victim to labeling others and even categorize them in I guess expected behaviors, yet I don’t approach them and interact with them in any way as I moreso observe and actively try to understand who this person is and what they’re about and as I’m doing that it’s like was I right , did I read this person right type of thing. I feel as if people should genuinely learn about others before labeling, taking in appearance for subtle details yet truly observing the personality to categorize. However, the labeling from others is inevitable, we are programmed this way as humans.
I can most definitely relate to being labeled as well. Legit everyone I have met has remembered me because of my hair. After coming back from quarantine, I always heard “I know that hair anywhere!” followed by some slight catching up. And it’s not that I don’t mind it, but it kind of makes me scared to ever part with it honestly. Everyone has attached it to my identity, so much so that I don’t really know how I’d feel without it.
I believe that a lot of things that are bad and good have the potential to be the opposite. With labels, they can really be a good thing, but it’s also really easy for them to be bad (especially when we start applying them to people). Labels make it much easier to identify things, people, and places, especially when you have no prior knowledge on it or the person. When it comes down specifically to people and the labels that they may have, the big thing that makes it more negative than good, is who is labeling what. When it’s others outside of yourself doing the labeling on you, I mean they could get it right, but the chances are in some way they will mislabel you. I was definitely one of those kids that got bullied because of their weight in school and people suck. If people were less focused on how others looked and stopped making a whole bunch of unnecessary comparisons, maybe people would suck less… or maybe they would just find another way to suck. Regardless, you know yourself better than anyone else, so fuck em.