The dreaded boys section and girls section. The first thing you see when you walk into a store that sells clothes is that divide between blue and pink.

On one side is camouflage, trucks, dinosaurs, superheroes, and dark colors. The other is glitter, bows, cute animals, hearts, flowers, and bright colors. I didn’t specify which one was boys and which was girls but I didn’t have to, did I? Why has society spent so much time telling us these are the only two styles that exist, and they exist only for one of two genders?

My first experience shopping in the mens section was in middle school. I started with graphic t-shirts because I liked the fit better (women’s shirts: why do you insist on being so tight around the armpits?). I felt more comfortable with the looser fit. I then experimented with other types of shirts (I’ll be honest, it was flannels) and jeans. Mens jeans just have so much pocket space. Come on, women need pockets too. Where else would we keep our rocks? Experimenting with clothing came with questioning my gender. Suddenly I was stuffing my hair into my beanie to see what I would look like.

I can’t remember how, but I grew out of that and started shopping in the womens section again. Whether that came with the embarrassment I felt while wearing mens jeans around girls wearing skinny jeans and skirts, or just a change in my personal style, I couldn’t tell you.

That doesn’t really matter because I’m back in the mens section. And what I’ve noticed while exploring my nonbinary identity is that there are now more shops that sell gender neutral or unisex clothing. But what does that mean? Scrolling through different websites, it usually just means mens clothing that they also show female models in. Dark colors, boxy fit, usually street wear. I know there are websites and shops out there that actually sell good gender neutral clothing, so just pretend I’m not talking about them. Right now I’m talking about stores like PacSun. Most of what is in their gender neutral collection might as well be in the mens section. It’s almost like they think gender neutral means traditionally masculine. Why are designers so afraid of putting traditionally feminine clothes on male presenting people?