When you grow up as the chubby kid you constantly face many more challenges then the skinny kids. As a female who was bigger than many of the other females you constantly get teased and picked on. I vividly remember the terrible names the boys would call out as I walked the halls. I remember throwing away half of my lunch because I was deathly afraid of people seeing me eat. I would skip lunch too on most days hoping I would lose weight. I was around 12 years old praying that I would lose weight. No 12 year old should be so consumed with their weight the way that I was. Along with the challenges of bullying at school, it carried on into my home life.
My parents both were star athletes who were both skinny and constantly working out. They would keep food away from me and make rude comments every time I was around. They would call me names such as tons of fun or big girl. It was hard enough facing the bullies from school, but coming home to an even more toxic household played a huge role in the mental problems that I face today. The bullying from home carried on to my teenage years and I eventually developed an eating disorder. Constant calorie counting and meal skipping became apart of my daily life. I would not eat anything unless I knew the calories and it was low calorie. My parents would yell at me for going into the fridge or even eating a snack. No child or teenager should be reprimanded for eating. People need food to fuel their body and the fact that some people judge others for eating is disgusting and ridiculous. The stigma for women has always been to be skinny and have no flaws. It is so damaging for young girls to grow up thinking they have to look a certain way in order to be found as “pretty” or “sexy”. Our body is unique to us and no one should be treated differently for the way they look. I grew up being treated as less then because I was overweight and it emotionally damaged me and led me to hate the way I look and constantly count the calories of everything I eat. Men constantly put other women down because of the way they look and never get reprimanded for it and it is unexceptable. We must break the stigma for women and how they should look. Everyone is beautiful and has a perfect body in their own unique way. No one deserves to be treated any different because of their appearance.
Unruly Bodies 
Omg, this broke my heart my to read. First of all, you are beautiful. I’m so sorry that not only you had to deal with the ridicule and cruel comments from your peers but your family as well. The fact that they tried to keep food from you is disheartening and you are so right, no twelve year old should feel obligated to count their calories and be afraid to allow people to watch them eat.
How did you reconcile with your relationship with food? Food is such a complicated issue. People view it as utilitarian or pleasurable. Of course the issue with weight does complicate our relationship with this. We grow up learning that we need to nourish our bodies with healthy vitamins and calories. With your parents being athletes, I wonder how they did not pay attention to your eating habits. How much of your phenomenology was accurate as insecurity can skew our perception? I hope you are better with your body image either way.
Firstly, I am so sorry that you had to go through this. You’re such a strong individual to have endured not only ridicule from others but from the people who are supposed to love you most, your family. Beauty is always from within, and you are beautiful to have gone through this. I hope you realize that, and I hope your parents do as well. It’s crazy to think that the ideal body is always derived from society. There was a time when the ideal was much different from the slim-thick, Kim Kardashian body type that is always advertised now. It’s truly damaging to the youth and I hope that you’ve grown to love your body for how it is. Every body is unique and beautiful in their own ways!
Reading this article really broke my heart. I am so sorry about everything you had to endure because of your appearance! With your parents being athletes it must have been hard for them and you to realize that not everyone can live the same way and be comfortable with it. No twelve year old should have to deal with the emotional burden of feeling bad about their body. Parents have to do such a better job at encouraging their children to feel beautiful the way they are. Insecurities from childhood grow and spread and are very traumatic ideas that stay with you for a long time.
I am so very sorry you had to carry this with you for so long. Your strength and wisdom had gotten you so far, and no Instagram model or fake magazine spread should change that. I also grew up bigger with athletic parents, in fact, both of my siblings were too. I was the chubby funny one, they labeled me things like “goofy” or “Jokester” not to put me in a box, I just don’t think they knew what else to do with me, I was odd to them for a while. It seems as though you’ve kept your identity strong and never given up, don’t! You are perfectly made!
I am so sorry that you had to go through this. Being a fellow chubby kid turned chubby adult, I can feel where you’re coming from when it comes to having an adverse relationship with food, and it is nothing a child should ever have to go through. I agree that we need to break the stigma, and I guess my only question would be where do we begin? Do we begin by debasing the historical contexts in which men have tried to ridicule a women’s body, or do we simply start from the present and move towards a better future?