The last 2 weeks have been a living hell for me. I have been so stressed out because of exams and finals, it just feels like my entire life is breaking apart. No matter how much I study, it feels like it will never be good enough. This week I had two exams, a quiz, and had to do an 8-page essay. Later on Wednesday found out that I got a B on an English essay, that I worked so hard on which now changed my grade from an A to a B in the class. In that moment of seeing that B, I cried. I just felt worthless the moment when I saw that grade because, in the back of my mind, I just thought about how I would never be good enough no matter how much I studied or put effort into an assignment or exam. No matter how much effort I put into all my classes, my grades just keep on going down, and I just feel like I was a mistake in life and should have never existed. That I’m just a useless human being that can’t even do the simplest things like a damn essay. This has even caused me to have a fear of losing my scholarship if I don’t study enough and it has even caused me to become more depressed.
I even thought of just giving up at one point but at the same time, the fear of getting a bad grade still motivates me to still try and not give up. After having my therapy session today, my therapist made me realize that a grade can’t define how smart or good I am. That it’s just a letter and that I’m already good enough. At this point, I just want to study, finish my exams, and go back home and be with my cat!!!!
Also good luck on exams everyone, you got this :)) (here’s a pic of my baby to help with the stress)
Unruly Bodies 
Hello! I know exactly how you feel. It is most certainly a lot of pressure. I remember my first semester here, it was ok, until finals. I managed to pass, but one of my next courses, no matter how much I read, studied, quizzed myself and asked for assistance from the professor, I still failed. I was put on academic probation. That sucked. My confidence went down and I was angry. Rather than being depressed, I was pissed. I thought the course and the teacher were a waste of my time. As I near graduation, my attitude has changed. It could be because I’m older and already has a good government job, but I want to further my education. Yes, I agree, the grade in your courses do not reflect how smart you are. For my job, I had to submit proof of my AA degree, so I submitted my degree and my transcript. The hr department was not concerned about my F in anthropology. So, as the semester comes to a close, study as much as you can, take a break to breathe and relax, and make time for fun things. You do not need an additional factor for stress. My motto, as long as I pass, I do not give a damn what grade I get at this point. I wish you well on your exams.
I completely understand how you’re feeling. Finals and exams can be incredibly stressful and overwhelming, and it’s easy to get caught up in the pressure and feel like a failure when things don’t go as planned. But please remember that your worth as a person is not defined by a grade or an exam result. You are so much more than that.
This. I completely understand and feel the same way. Growing up I was never an A student, I was a C student and my parents made sure I knew that and told me I wouldn’t get into college without a sport scholarship, even tho I didn’t want to play (they forced me). I understand the not feeling good enough, because sometimes society makes us feel like grades are the only thing that we have to define us, but its not true. You are more than capable. Keep pushing!
I feel this. For me I always struggle in between Thanksgiving and the end of the semester. It feels like things are kicked into overdrive and I am usually on the verge of burnout by this time. Especially with the holidays, this time of year is really overwhelming. Self-care is super important, especially when you have been caught in a cycle of negative self-talk. I also like to think about if the situation will impact me in 5 years to help me put things into perspective. Trust in yourself too, you’re almost there! Things will always need to get done in life, so make sure you treat yourself kindly.
Hii, I completely understand how you are feeling. This week is a crazy week for me as I have 4 papers due for different classes which has been on the back of my mind since thanksgiving. I hate writing long papers because sometimes I feel like I have nothing else to say. However, I am starting to take it piece by piece and hopefully by the weekend I will be happier. You got this! Take a break (go out for some coffee or food) and come back with a fresh mind to tackle these finals!!
I relate to this a lot, specifically the fear of getting “poor” grades. I’m putting quotes around the “poor” since I’m talking about getting B’s. Objectively, I know that a B is a good grade; After all, 80% still takes up most of 100%.
But even though I know that a B isn’t actually a bad grade, I still don’t want to get them. I grew up with a mom who emphasized getting the best grades, on account of she didn’t want me to go to a normal public school and instead go to a magnet school (she’s a substitute teacher and she knew that the teaching at the local high school was awful).
To make a very long story short, I became obsessed with getting only A’s out of fear and fear alone. And that reaction stayed with me even though I’m in college and my mother no longer cares about my grades (she has also come to regret her choices in middle school).
I overwork myself on homework assignments and projects, and if I finish a test that I don’t feel confident on I will cry. If I get a B on an assignment, I can only think of how it will bring my grade down.
Knowing that you are not defined by your grades is the first step, but it’s also important to recognize that it’s hard to internalize and unlearn that behavior, but not impossible.
P.S. If you are someone that cries after taking a test for fear of doing poorly, I’d recommend letting yourself grieve (saying this as someone who actively tries not to cry). Literally just set aside 30 minutes or an hour and just let yourself cry it all out. I know everyone is different (this was a recommendation from my therapist actually) but it wouldn’t hurt to try.
Hey :), your furry friend is so ADORABLE. But I understand your stress of finals. These weeks are the most excruciating for us students, having to cram so much information for a final. We all handle certain situations differently, and from the perspective of someone who is nonresistant to strive for the best, I understand how you feel. Your therapist was 100% right, your grades don’t define the smart meter 🙂 These exams are testing you on exact knowledge you learned throughout the year, and not everyone is bound to ace perfect grades on these things. You’re winning in the end game, keep working hard! Best of luck on your final exams ❤
Your feelings are so incredibly valid. Finals week at its core is just stress. The amount of work you have to do versus the percentage impact it has on your grade should be studied. As a public health major, I have 2-3 finals per class and over the years Ive come to accept it because if i think too long about it I genuinely start to go crazy. I just want to say even though it may not seem like youre doing a good job based on the grades you got the fact that you were able to keep your grade so high for this long and still get a B on the paper is impressive. Everyone works at their own pace and requires different levels of achievement to satisfy them. In my opinion, this doesnt make anyone less smart or worth less than anyone else.