Yesterday morning on my way to my 8am exam I stopped by Starbucks to grab a cup of coffee. I was super stressed about my exam and I had not gotten much sleep since I was awake most of the night studying. Continue reading
Body image and polyamory: an exploration
It’s endlessly intriguing to me how our view of certain things can be changed completely by new experiences. I have been thinking about this a lot lately, because after 11 years together, my husband and I have taken an unexpected (but very positive) step with our marriage — we are exploring polyamory. Something I took for granted over the course of more than a decade in a stable relationship was how many things I didn’t have to think about, especially when it came to my body. Continue reading
The Price of Self-Esteem
Being bigger is not easy, as anyone who is can tell you. From a bit of chub to full on large, people have a hard time dealing with it. Larger women are more often seen as either repulsive or sexually intriguing, while larger men are seen as pals, buddies, men who know how to live. The gendered standards for both are so simple and terrible.
I wish I had that luxury.
Warning: Fat Girl Working Out
I felt like I needed “Warning: Fat Girl Working Out” on a t-shirt when I started working out at my new gym.I stood outside the gym door going back and forth about whether or not I should go through with my workout plan. I have always had insecurities about my weight. I was overweight the majority of my life and have dealt with it day by day, but it wasn’t until I studied abroad in the United Kingdom that I really noticed how “big” I was. I had gone back and forth about going to the gym weeks in advance. I was already here so why not walk into the gym, what is the worst that could happen?
Procrastinating Bodies
Well, here we are again. It’s the day that an assignment is due and you’re still working on it. Continue reading
Dressing the Part
We live in a society that connects dress with identity. If you dress like this… then you must be that… Continue reading
Trigger Warning: Triggers
“Wait, I don’t get it, why can’t you come to the party tonight?” My best friend asks, tilting her head in confusion as I struggle to finally say that after all of my drug abuse, I feel extraordinary uncomfortable around any sorts of substances besides shisha. Continue reading
how do you experience the world?
I spent twenty minutes with my eyes closed, and I went about my daily business in my room. I opened drawers, found objects, put on bracelets, blew up a balloon. I decorated my room some. I even drew a picture.
Continue reading
No I’m Not Angry, This Is Just My Neutral Face
Growing up, I have always been told that I have a very expressive face. If I am ever feeling a certain emotion, my face goes to the extreme to express it. I wasn’t even aware of it until people started pointed it out to me. My face would just come out the way it did. My expressive face apparently didn’t just occur when I felt bouts of emotion, it also affected my neutral facial expression. To be frank and to the point, I basically have “resting bitch face.” Continue reading
Questions that need answers
You don’t realize how serious an injury rearranges your life until you experience it. A great way to look at this is to understand the following saying, “you can sympathize with a person’s situations/experience that you otherwise haven’t gone through, but you cannot empathize with them.
Unruly Bodies 