Author: watch more horror movies

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The Substance, Horror, and Ugliness Politics

Illustration by me of a vial of “Activator” from the film The Substance with small green hand prints.

The Substance is easily my favorite horror film to come out this year, and probably my favorite film regardless of genre to come out of 2024. It executes common horror tropes beautifully while offering a combination of fresh new ideas that haven’t felt explored in the specific way Coralie Fargeat, the director, addresses them. The film’s plot and general message are also incredibly relevant to politics of Desire and how physical attractiveness is measured among different groups of people.

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Embodiment in the Digital Age

A quick self-portrait doodle I did today that describes my feelings regarding the ever-increasing presence tech has in our lives.

A nih.gov article from 2013 states that an ideal amount of screen time for the average adult should be no more than 2 hours per day. That figure just 11 years later feels completely impossible to achieve, almost like a funny joke. I could hit those 2 hours, 4 times over just working on one school assignment. I have a much more robust and stable social circle online compared to any friendships I’ve managed to foster in real life. My new car’s speedometer and tacometer are both on a digital screen. I can’t even lower my daily screen time when I’m driving. Something about that is kind of terrifying to me.

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GAD and Emotional Labor — A Full-Time Job

Earlier today, I had to go grocery shopping. I was missing a few things around my apartment, and naturally had to make a quick stop at the Giant near campus to grab a couple of things. The trip itself didn’t take more than 30 minutes, and despite the crowds in the store, I had no issue finding and purchasing everything I needed.

By the time I returned to my apartment, my heart rate was averaging 120, I was covered in stress sweat, and I felt like my brain was scrambled eggs, just like the one “Your Brain on Drugs” ad — except my brain was just on tons of stress hormones.

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Autistic Masking & Trans Passing — The Venn Diagram is a Circle

Autistic people are a lot more likely than the neurotypical population to identify as transgender — something I personally chalk up to us having a keener eye for social norms that make no sense (the gender binary being no exception). As an autistic trans person who has to deal with the social repercussions of both these parts of myself, I have noticed how society is built not only to prioritize cisgender neurotypical people, but to actively shun those who don’t fit in either category in very similar ways.

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