As of now in the world we live in, commercials and advertisements are common staples of society that are everywhere no mater where we look or go, but most people normally don’t think twice about them or look into them deeper level. This is due to us being desensitized to surplus amount commercials and advertisements we have been exposed to over the years, to the point that we have created apps to remove them so we don’t have to see them as we surf online on websites.

But what if we step back and did an experiment? Lets say I was an alien lifeform from another planet, and these commercials and advertisements were the only medium I could use to learn about the human race and the male and females of it species. Without question, my image and idea of what humans would be highly likely and most definitely inaccurate and twisted due to such a small pool of (quiet inaccurate) information available to me. Even then, what do these advertisements say about the women and men of the human race, and what would an alien being from a foreign plane of existence assume about us humans just from looking through these advertisements?

From looking through a lifestyle and home magazine, issue: Summer 2019, there was a good amount of advertisements I could view through and observe. When looking through advertisements with men present in them, one would perceive that human men are influenced through the objects and activities that can allow them to feel strength and power that they themselves lack and how their ads can help any man regardless of ambition and ability. In this magazine, there is an enforcement of the idea around family and financial success involved as well. I took note that there is a noticeably low amount of male advertisement in the magazine, and because of that, and alien lifeform would think that men are not useful to convince sales in this sort of demographic in this particular kind of magazines.

Notably, when looking at ads with women in them (or as the star focus), there was so much more ads involving women in them compared to their male counter parts. In the magazine, almost all advertisements had women in them, even with the ones with men in them. Because of this one would have much more “information” they could work with. From what has been seen and shown in these ads, women’s concerns and ideals are much more detailed, and yet shallow in its superficial substance.

Information that has been given from these ads would say that women are much more focused on the importance of their physical appearance, even in the most simplistic of daily tasks such as the style of her kitchen, even though there was an ad with barely the bottom half of her face was shown but her body and frame took the majority of an ad, while the main point of the ad ,the oven, was just a small neat square in the center. As stated before, in these ads, women seem heavily focused on their physical beauty, especially the face. And from this, one would think a woman’s worth is based on their beauty, family life as well, but its is much more focus on how physically attractive.

It’s all strange when you look at these ads from an aliens’ point of view, huh?

[For anybody wondering what magazine I used, it was the “MAGNOLIA JOURNAL” (summer 2019)]

Before the pandemic, I was living on campus away from home, and I really enjoyed the freedom that came with it. But when the pandemic started, I was away visiting family in Arizona, so when I came back to Maryland, I had to quarantine myself at my brother’s apartment for three and a-half weeks before I could move back home with my parents.

During those three and a half week was also the last few weeks of the spring 2020 semester; so I had to take not only the last few classes in a place I wasn’t used to, I also had to take my finals there as well, which definitely had a huge effect on my mental health and grades.

Even when I was able to move back home with my mother and step-father, I wouldn’t be able to even hug my own mother for another three weeks.

Because of the COVID pandemic, I couldn’t see my friends, go outside, couldn’t go to a convention that I go to every year during the summer; and overall generally lost the ability to do the things that made me happy.

All of that stress had caused me to fall back into a very deep state of depression during the whole month of July; I stopped taking care of myself and spent most of my days sleeping because I couldn’t stand being awake, where as my dreams always seem more appealing to live in.

My depression at that time was eating me away till the point where there was almost nothing left, and I felt that the world around me had lost its color. Also, what didn’t help was the political climate/what is going on in the world, which made it hard to find any good news with what was going on during that point in time.

I had missed being able to do things and enjoy life, I missed having the freedom to go out and spending time with my friends; I missed being happy.

That summer of 2020 was, without question, one of lowest points in my adult life and I can only hope it can only go up from there.

The simplest things can be some of the most perplexing things to understand. At least that is the way I feel.

Last night, I saw one of my favorite artists, Polo G, perform at a concert. It was something that I had been waiting for months to go to and experience. While I was standing there, I realized how truly great humans are.

Not only did the man performing less than 20 yards away from me make music that people loved enough to spend money on a ticket to see him rap; he came up with this music out of his personal experiences. His wrong doings. His mistakes. His greatest moments. His worst moments. 

He created something universal that all types of people can relate to.

However, the most important take away to me to be where your feet are. Often times a cliché and overused statement, but something that holds so much truth and validity.

I could feel the base in my body. I could hear him and thousands around me sing the songs I love most. I could feel the thousands of people around me. 

While something as small as attending a concert may not require any afterthought, it can also highlight what the human body, and mind, is truly capable of.  

We should learn to appreciate the finer things. (Also one of my favorite songs by Polo G)

One of my favorite video games to play is called Valorant. Valorant is a multiplayer first person shooter (FPS) released in June 2020. It’s already become very popular for all ages. Sometimes when I play a game some of my teammates are in middle school, while others are in college or older. While there is a large age range, Valorant definitely has more male players than female players. And while I enjoy the game a lot, as a woman, it can be very toxic. Many of the male players play very competitively and have this general idea that women who play video games are naturally bad. Because of this they make it their goal to make any girl playing feel like absolute shit. 

I started playing Valorant during quarantine after seeing some of my favorite streamers play. It seemed like a fun game to play with friends, and it was not like your typical FPS where you are shooting people down in a war torn city. There are different characters, called agents, you can play that have special abilities and generally the game is very aesthetically pleasing. Prior to Valorant the only games I would play were Animal Crossing, Pokemon, Mario, Stardew Valley etc. These games are all very peaceful and not competitive at all. So when I first started playing Valorant I was awful. I was not familiar with the maps, the different agents, their powers and I had never played a FPS before. I also had no idea how toxic the Valorant community can be. My first time experiencing a few toxic players was very early on. I was placed with four other random teammates and we were losing by a lot. I was already not good at the game and I was missing almost every shot and dying early on in each round. Then I made the mistake of making a callout of where an enemy was on voice chat. As soon as my other teammates heard I was a girl, the taunts and harassment began. The first guy said “You’re a girl? So that’s why we’re losing.” Another teammate turned on their voice chat and said “Shouldn’t you be in the kitchen right now?” Every time that I made a mistake or died, one of them would make a comment taunting me. When we lost the game, they cussed me out one last time. I remember after that game I turned off my PC, took off my headphones, and cried. It already sucks when you’re playing badly, but when there are other people constantly saying awful things it makes it so much worse and tears you down mentally. And incidents like these have happened multiple times to me. Now I never use voice chat unless I know I am doing really well and I am confident the people I am playing with are not assholes. It sucks because communicating with your teammates during the game is very important and helps a lot. Instead, I have to quickly type out different callouts in the text chat. I also had to change my username from my name to something more “gender neutral.” 

I have seen a lot of video clips of women having similar experiences and feeling the exact same way. Valorant has a report system, and almost every time I have reported a teammate for bullying they have been penalized… but the punishment is only temporary and it does not help the overall problem. Despite all of the toxicity I have had to deal with, I still enjoy playing Valorant a lot. Instead of playing with random people, I have a few friends who will get on a discord call with me and we play together. I have so much more fun playing this way, especially because all of my friends play the game to actually have fun. A lot of Valorant players take the game so seriously, and it just sucks the fun out of it. I have noticed a lot more girls playing Valorant which is really exciting. I hope one day this ridiculous idea that women are bad at video games goes away. So many times my girl friends and I will outperform the men that are playing. And honestly it feels so good humbling them, maybe the next time they play with a girl they’ll shut the fuck up. 🙂

Before coming to this class I had some experience with terrible accessibility. One of my best friends in high school had Multiple Sclerosis and was in a wheelchair. No one at school ever treated her differently and she was an amazing friend. But our school had terrible accessibility. We had one big elevator that she would use. That thing looked like it was 100 years old. It would squeak and the lights would flicker. Half the time it would be down and wouldn’t work. It would have so many techinal difficulties thorughout the school year. Our school had 3 levels which meant some classes were on different floors. Everyone would have to take the stairs between each class, but for my friend she would have to take the elevator which would barely work. She would have to miss classes and stay in homeroom which is totally messed up on the school’s part. It is a necessity to have accessibility that actually works and is not old as dirt. When I came to UMBC I was thinking accessibility would be better since it’s not an old high school in Delaware, but to my surprise this campus is so many stairs. My friend would not have an easy time navigating UMBC which is so sad to me everyone deserves a chance to experience college like everyone else. Colleges and all schools should prioritize accessibility and make it modern and up to date. There is no excuse for faulty elevators or anything like that. There needs to be accessible for everyone. Not one single person deserves to do something if someone else cannot. It is unfair and wrong. I personally do need accessibility, but many people do and it’s not fair for universities and public schools to overlook such a huge issue that needs to be fixed. This is a problem that needs to be fixed so we can be inclusive to everyone and let everyone have a chance to what they want.

Burnout is a common experience that many college students undergo with the fluctuations in stress-levels in school. According to Merriam-Webster, burnout can be defined as “exhaustion of physical or emotional strength or motivation usually as a result of prolonged stress or frustration”. In simpler terms, burnout is feeling an extreme amount of stress after working so hard, whether it’s physical or mental. According to the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality, there is a “rising prevalence of burnout among clinicians” which can not only threaten the safety of their patients but also lead to impaired functions in physicians, leading to a deteriorating mental health. 

As a pre-med student, this is a common term that I’ve consistently heard and experienced. We work ourselves to the point of physical and mental exhaustion for the sake of a career that still results in the same outcome. But there are ways to combat burnout, one of the main ones being to take time off from working and occupy yourself with a more relaxing activity. This can be particularly difficult for someone in the healthcare field, who rarely gets time off or someone in medical school whose future depends on their performance in academics. I think the main premise I want to get across is how important it is to have mental health resources for students but also physicians, who are responsible for people’s livelihoods. There are so many measures that medical schools can take to promote mental health such as changes in the curriculum, helping to limit student loan debt, promote a positive learning environment instead of a cutthroat one, provide more services for people experiencing burnout without stigma. While our careers may be the most important goals we have at this time, our health is just as important if not more. Especially as a physician, who is responsible for the wellbeing of hundreds of patients, they should be receiving the best treatment and prevention for burnout and mental illnesses.

Citations:

“Dictionary by Merriam-Webster: America’s Most-Trusted Online Dictionary.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/. 

Grose, Jessica. “How to Avoid Burnout When You Have Little Ones.” The New York Times, The New York Times, 15 Apr. 2020, https://www.nytimes.com/article/parental-burnout-guide.html. 

Helen Murrin was in her early 60’s when a stranger snapped this photo without her permission. Murrin was relaxing on the beach with her husband when he asked to take a picture of her. Posing for her husband, she says she was trying to “look good” for him. Unbeknownst to them, a photographer was lurking from a distance with a long-range camera lens. This photo quickly went viral. Inspiring women of a certain age everywhere to post bikini photos. Murrin however stated she never felt comfortable in her body until she got older.

More recently actress Justin Bateman has faced online ridicule for the way she is aging. The comments have been brutal. She had admitted to making the mistake of googling herself

Bad move. Bad move.

However, Bateman has come to the conclusion. She no longer gives a damn what people think f her aging face. And has written a book about it.

If you don’t know by now, we all will change if we are lucky to live long enough.

Unrealistic images of physical beauty affect even us girls of a certain age. I know it affects me more now than it did when I was younger. How many times did I check my image before I went into my first virtual class? I aint even lying. 

 I look at Jennifer Lopez or Janet Jackson and others and think, “damn why don’t I….

No, I don’t.

 Instead, I think, “Damn I wish I had the money to afford a personal chef and personal trainer like they do.”  

They ARE beauties but even they don’t look like Jennifer Lopez and Janet Jackson when they wake up. And that’s ok. Now that’s not to say they don’t wake up beautiful. We all do.  But unfortunately for us older gals the pressure to look a certain way can be overwhelming especially when you are expected to remain forever young. I listen as I hear female friends fall into the trap.

“ Im 62 but people tell me I look 45 all the time.” My thoughts, “girl stop.” But I don’t say that. But I was thinkin  it.

“Can u guess who’s the mother and who’s the daughter.” 

Me with my RBF, “Why?” But I don’t say that. But I was thinkin it.

Or 

50 is the new 30. 

BULLSHIT!

50 is just…50! And it’s fabulous no matter how many wrinkles you have. How many stretch marks you have or dont have and regardless of your weight. The Fabulousness of 50 is how you live your life…full.

My personal favorite. (side-eye)

When 20 somethings make comments about another woman’s age or looks. We girls of a certain age are jealous of their youth.

No BITCH!Been there. Done it. Good luck with your next 300 periods, 3 roommates, and high-ass car insurance.

YES, It would do us well as a society if we stopped commenting on changing physical appearances.

Stop placing unrealistic expectations on what we should all look like.

Accept that beauty is all shapes, sizes, genders, and ageless. 

WE ALL change. And change isn’t necessarily bad.

Hey, my ass is wayyy bigger than it use to be. My thighs ughhh and my quarantine 15 quickly became a quarantine 25, but who’s counting right. 

But after 5 babies I can say with a smile on my face, I still have some nice boobs!

I used to love my hometown. I loved everything about it as a child! My neighborhood was so children centered.. always doing things for the kids. It wasn’t until I got older and started really paying attention that I realized where I live is kind of a messed up place..

One thing in particular that really needs to change is the stress that is put on children/teens. From the time these children are 4 years old they’re expected to be the best at sports, the smartest in preschool and all around be the most successful. Yup.. the most successful at 4 years old. I never really saw it like this when I was young because my parents wouldn’t dream of raising me this way. Long story short- there is truly a suicide epidemic in my hometown. I could name 10 people I have personally known that have committed suicide in the last 8 years, from my high school alone. The parents around here don’t care, the schools don’t care. A 16 year old took her life around 8 months ago. And someone had the nerve to say, “just get on medicine, how are you that sad?” 

WHAT????

Where are people supposed to turn? If you aren’t apart of a picture perfect family around here then you might as well not exist. The pressure and stress put on kids, especially high schoolers is like nothing I’ve seen. High school isn’t supposed to be like that!!!!! No one is there for you, not even your parents. It’s all a competition to these people, and it’s so so sad to see now that I’m older. 

I work with the absolute sweetest girl, we’ll call her K. She breaks my heart everyday because high school has destroyed her mental health. All her parents care about is her getting into a prestigious college like her sisters. They don’t listen to her cries for help and it’s honestly one of the most horrible things I’ve ever seen. This is just one of wayyyy too many examples that happen everyday. I wish I could hug every single person in high school, because I know I needed it. 

This post was hectic! It’s just something that hurts my heart and I’m sure others can relate.