I woke the morning of Tuesday, May 22, 2007 to a horror nothing could have prepared me for; my eight-week old son, Cyrus, had died overnight. My sleepy, sing-song, morning greetings to my baby were met with lifelessness. My memories of that day are mere flashes of moments: Continue reading
**This post is about breastfeeding. I hope you read it, but if not, please take a look at the resources I’ve linked, as there are many and I have found them to be invaluable tools for breastfeeding mothers.**
Just the word “breastfeeding” brings mixed reactions. I don’t know many people who find it overtly offensive. I know many people who find it as natural as breathing. Most people I know are somewhere in between, approving of the act for its purpose and benefits, but feeling opposed to the actual witnessing of it. I myself have existed on various levels of acceptance as I’ve aged, so I’m not unfamiliar with the uneasiness it gives people. What I hope to do here as I share my personal experience is offer perspective, perhaps a chance for some to alter their view of breastfeeding by considering the breastfeeder. Continue reading
I think it’s safe to say that our society has a pretty ridiculous obsession with breasts. Breasts are shoved in our faces all the time—through screens, billboards, pages of magazines, what have you. They have become something of a paragon of beauty in our society; so many women today are dissatisfied with their natural breasts and go to great lengths to have them molded into “beautiful” breasts. I don’t know if we ask it enough: Why does our society put such a premium on breasts?
Many women I know are baffled by the appeal that breasts hold. I have often heard women respond to qualifying or sexualizing comments about breasts with statements such as “Why do people care what breasts look like?” or “What is so sexy about breasts? They’re only there so we can feed our children” or, my favorite, “They’re just sacks of milk.” *shudder*
I get the biological retort; it is a bit silly that we’re essentially sexualizing our udders (gross, but true). But at the same time, I can see how they came to hold the power that they have. Breasts are life-givers, really. They are how we provide for our offspring. No matter how many modern advancements are put forth in child care, the essential bond between a mother and child will always be associated with the act of breastfeeding.
So this begs the question: does the power of breasts only lie in their ability to “function”? Are breasts only glorious and powerful if they can nourish a child? I ask this because there is a strong possibility I will not be able to breastfeed my children.
Facebook is deleting personal pictures of Mom’s breastfeeding and calling them obscene.
Moms are being ordered to cover up in malls and Target if they are breastfeeding.
Isn’t breastfeeding what women are encouraged to do? Hasn’t the healthy party line been to breastfeed for at least the first few months to build immunity in babies? Some communities are encouraging women to breastfeed to help curb childhood obesity. There are proven health benefits for both the child and mother. So, women are being told to breastfeed on the one hand and then told they can’t do it anywhere but in their homes on the other. If they want to breastfeed in public, they must hide themselves away in a bathroom. How dare they offend anyone with the view of their children breastfeeding!
Maggie Gyllenhaal breastfeeding
Women spend their entire lives held up as sexual beings, as objects. But where does that end when a woman becomes a mother and wants to breastfeed her child? Hasn’t the image of “the mother” become one that is without sexuality? Maybe breastfeeding blurs that line for some. We see this attitude in breast cancer awareness campaigns crying to “Save the boobies!” as well. Women’s worth is in their sexuality and if they use their breasts to feed their children (some might say the breasts most primal and “natural” purpose) they are being viewed under that same sexual gaze. Is our society so sexually repressed (and obsessed) that we can’t separate breasts from being sexual objects?
Part of the British campaign to encourage breastfeeding
Many breastfeeding moms are taking to activism to try and bring awareness to the issue. Recently on etsy, an innovative breastfeeding mom created a crocheted “boobie beanie.” They can be made in any skin tone and nipple shade, to match your own.
The Boobie Beanie!
Other mom’s are holding “breastfeed-in’s,” at facebook’s corporate headquarters or at local malls. Celebrities have also taken to the cause, breastfeeding in public and allowing the paparazzi to take pictures of them with their children. In Britain, they even had a celebrity campaign to encourage breastfeeding. Unfortunately, until we as a society can move past this constant sexualization of breasts, I fear things will still be difficult for breastfeeding mommies.
Mayim Bailik breastfeeding on the subway in NYC.
Unruly Bodies 