Honestly this blog post is probably just going to be my inner monologue for the past week because I needed to get it out so it might be a little jumbled but I hope it makes some sense to whoever reads this.

You know I thought I had it all figured out by senior year of High School before I came to this PWI but now that I’m here it seems I still have so much more to figure out. Me coming probably was my best and worst mistake I could’ve made due to me starting to have that feeling like I don’t belong again because of the way I talk or the way I dress I feel like everywhere I go there are small criticisms being made of me and sometimes it comes from the people I consider friends here. Joke or not it really open up my eyes to how different everyone can grow up and how different everyone really is but do I deserve to be called a “thug” because I’m comfortable with sagging my pants or because I come from a all black area. And the answer is of course no I don’t deserve that.

But I’m not going to bash this school that much because if I would’ve never went to a PWI I would’ve never truly understood some of my thought processes, like I just came to a realization recently that I have become someone that little me would’ve never wanted me to be and it’s sad but without the people that I met this year and those “thug” comments I would’ve never been able to look at myself from a outer view.

So, now I truly am starting to understand it even if the healing process hurts but I am who I am and there’s nothing wrong with it and everyone will have their own perceptions of me but that’s ok as long as I don’t lose sight of me again I’ll be ok.