I get really bad headaches. Constant, enduring, painful headaches. Continue reading
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QUEERIES: My Love for Eli Clare’s Exile and Pride and Why You Should Go Ahead and Read It, Okay?
I haven’t connected to any other class’s readings as I have connected with Eli Clare’s Exile & Pride. I’m trying to figure out why, and I still don’t rightly know, but I needed to share.
It seems obvious to say, “Well, I like the subject matter,” but really. I do. And it is all very different but so intrinsically connected, that I feel bad that I ever doubted the meshing of these worlds into one book. The environment, queerness, and disability (to narrow it down to a main triad) are all sides of the same coin. The environment–the one he have created and the one that has always been–often dictates disability. 
Disability provokes a queer understanding of identity. Being queer in different environments–rural and urban–is like being a polar bear or a house cat, a bird or a lost lizard in a sewer. The criticism that Clare invokes when talking about these topics is also critical of race and ethnicity and of privilege and gender. Who was the first to claim land as an inexhaustible resource? Who dictates the gender and sexual norms? Who creates the urban space that perpetuates disability? Clare touches on all of these linked together identities and sites, and it feels so right. I learned so much from Clare’s writing, but I also picked up his sense of criticism; that calm, assertive, compassionate voice that questions why and kicks out with fervor. Clare’s criticism is beatifically formed and so god damn smart, but it’s not the only thing that keeps me in the book.
Being And
Trigger warning *sexual assault / heroin use*
I’ve been thinking a lot about narratives lately. I’m going to try and unpack some of the stories I use my body to tell.
*seriously the above trigger stuff will show up*
Touch-a Touch-a Touch-a Touch Me!
Rocky Horror Picture Show
I was inspired while reading Navigating Boundaries to discuss my own love for physical contact!
Navigating Boundaries
There really isn’t any other way to say it, so I’m just going to say it. I like physical contact…a lot.
I don’t even mean sexual contact. I mean the most basic skin to skin, body to body contact there is. A hug, a handshake, a high five.
I like it when my arms brush against strangers on the street. I love it when my relatives hug me or when a friend comforts me with back rub. I like long embraces and holding hands. I love getting my hair cut at a salon because my hairdresser rubs my scalp with his fingertips. I save up money every semester for a massage at a spa. I feel happy when my yoga teacher touches me to adjust my pose during a class. One of my favorite people to greet is a friend of mine who always gives me a back cracking hug, long and strong as if he hasn’t seen me in years. I love cats and dogs because they’re often affectionate; they want me to pet them, hold them, scratch them behind their ears.
The Great Wall of Penis
Last year Kelly Martin Broderick wrote a blog post about The Great Wall of Vagina. As an artist myself I was able to appreciate the wall as art. I cannot imagine the time and effort the artist put into every cast. The fact that so many women took time to participate is amazing!
I decided to do a bit of research and came across PENIS. Big ones, short ones, fat ones, long one and the list goes on. Joseph Tailor’s project entitled ‘Art Work “100” ‘ is a casting project of many penis. This made me extremely uncomfortable. I didn’t understand why. I don’t mind looking at my boyfriend’s penis. His is pretty cool. I also didn’t mind looking at the wall of vaginas.
(Yes that is a Golden Penis. Not to be confused with the Golden Snitch)
Thinking hard -no pun intended- about my feelings I came to the conclusion that it was because of the form of the penis. Let me explain:
The vaginas on the great wall are all carefully placed and appear to be that of relief sculptures. They are delicate and unique. This is truly how a vagina looks.
While each penis is also unique I felt almost as if they were looking at me. I realize it was easiest to capture the mold of a penis while it was hard but this is not realistic. A man’s penis can only achieve maximum size when it is erect. Does that mean you’re “less of a man” when it’s not?
Should I go on a run today?
I haven’t been feeling great about my body lately. It’s because I’ve been spending so much time at my desk or hunched over a book (thanks, finals). But it’s also because I haven’t been able to wear my favorite pair of jeans since I got back from my time abroad (where I ate everything I wanted because cultural experience!). I’m telling myself not to let a pair of pants make me feel this way about my body, but I’m feeling it. Continue reading
Death and Social Media
Over this break, we Fast and Furious fans were devastated by the loss of Paul Walker in a fatal car crash.
A Bra That Fits!
When I went over to my friend’s house this afternoon, the first thing she said to me was “help me measure myself!” No, she’s not on some sort of diet or fitness regimen. She was trying to figure out her real bra size from this fit guide.
I was curious to see if I have been wearing the wrong size all along, and my suspicions were correct. Instead of the 38C I thought I was, I ended up being a 32J (32GG in UK sizes)!
I have yet to see if this new size is valid or not since only a few handful of stores carry sizes DD and up (have you ever heard of a J cup? I hadn’t until today!). When I finally take a trip down to Nordstrom to try on a couple (very expensive, ugh) bras in this size, I’ll report back to you, but I figured I’d leave the guide here for you all. The results may shock you!
The guide also provides information about how to determine if you have a wide or narrow breast root, if your breasts are shallow or projected, or if they are fuller on the top or bottom. After you have figured out what shape your breasts are, the guide provides a list of stores and bra models that fit best for your breast shape. I found it to be an extremely helpful read.
Trust your body
About a month ago I went to visit my Doctor for the first time in about 5 years. I found after a certain age my primary physician was replaced by my gynecologist.
In general I think I’m healthy other than once a year getting the common cold or flu. Since the beginning of this semester I hadn’t been feeling my normal self. I had been suffering from stomachaches constantly, feeling exhausted even after a full night rest and suffering from headaches daily.
Unruly Bodies 