I was recently perusing the world wide webs when I came across an article entitled “7 Things To Look At When You Feel Bad About Your Body“. I encourage everyone to go read it now. Right this minute and then come back here…Go ahead…I’ll wait… (Warning: Contains bodies, in various forms and fashions)
Month: October 2013
Whatever Happened to Embracing One’s Curves!?
So after going through the Fat Bodies section in General Women Studies Class, I was left a bit uneasy. And you can’t blame me, like how can I accept the fact that the media wants to control what women put in their mouths and constantly blame regular women for the way they look? It’s all pure nonsense. Whatever happened to embracing one’s curves, however they look, big or small? I just don’t understand it. It frustrates me greatly.
cry about it
Riding the bus and an older women sitting in front of me is wearing a shimmery gold jacket with “Golden Age Club” embroidered in white letters on the back. Her face smiles naturally. A stop or two later, another women around the same age, maybe older, sits beside the other and pulls out a small, worn book from her purse. It’s one of those tiny things filled with appropriate Bible passages for any situation. She opens it up to a previously bookmarked chapter. “Bible Passages For Confidence.” I feel my face heat up and my throat tighten and my eyes become heavy. I start crying.
My Body Project of Getting Hit By Cars
I’ve found that the intersections between my body and moving vehicles are pretty productive. Sometimes you have to learn things the hard way … Continue reading
When Were We Happy?
Photo by Marie C.
Recently while I was perusing my Tumblr I came across this post. At first I was just going to scroll past, but then I decided to actually stop and look at it.
Ugh, I’m sick: Flu, strep, flep?
Since we’re talking about unruly bodies, I’m going to take some time to talk about how unruly the bodies in this house have been this week. Let’s start with mine.
Monday: I’m fine. It’s like every other day. By the time I’m ready for bed, my throat is a little sore. I figure it is probably nothing, worst case scenario the start of a cold. Who hasn’t been there? I am mistaken. Sleep eludes me that night (and many that follow). I must have a high fever because I have vivid, lifelike dreams about real life things (I am talking to Kelly about my bad resume in one… in another I receive a package I’ve been waiting on but I misplace it… and in another I forget to write a paper… ok, so these are nightmares). These dreams are clear fever indicators for me because my body always reacts to high fevers with dreams so real that I never know when I’m awake or sleeping. I keep getting out of bed, wandering the house looking for that package, wondering when I’ll fix my resume and trying to remember which paper I’ve forgotten. If it sounds fun, it isn’t. If it sounds more like hallucinations, it probably is. I “wake up” feeling more exhausted than when I laid down. My joints ache, from my knees and elbows to each individual knuckle. My head throbs. My throat feels raw and tingly. I feel like I can’t get myself out of bed. There is just an overwhelming sense of ickiness that I still can’t explain that makes me feel both like I should stay in bed, and like I should head to the doctors… Continue reading
Don’t Censor the Bush/The Politics of Pubes
Today I want to talk about pubes.
For many people, deciding how to groom their pubic hair is an issue fraught with anxiety, and women in particular are bombarded with images of completely smooth, hairless thighs and bikini lines that we are supposed to emulate and admire. We’re told to shave it, pluck it, wax it, sculpt it—it doesn’t really matter what method we use, as long as we’re rid of our unsightly hair. This standard is so pervasive that women’s pubic hair is now widely slandered as unhygienic (patently false), barbaric, and, above all, pornographic.
*pics of pubes after the cut* Continue reading
Moving Through the Space of Work & School
So, once again i’m here to talk about my fibromyalgia
*cue the violins*
haha but really this past week was very interesting.
Let me explain why.
So Friday before last I woke up and i just couldn’t bend my wrist. At first I thought I just slept on it at a weird angle and figured I could stretch it out and continue about my day. As the day progressed it only got worse. It became difficult to lift anything and driving to work was pretty painful. When I got to work one of my managers helped me out and wrapped it with gauze and tape then used a coffee sleeve as a splint (innovation at its best!) to keep it from moving. Now while this did limit my movements it did not stop the pain that was radiating from my wrist.
Lifting plates and holding cups, swiping credit cards and reaching for change in my pocket was all so painful now. Unfortunately for me I had to stay and work the rest of my shift. Before I left I took 2 tylenols to help. But it only slightly numbed it to a tolerable level of pain. This problem persisted through the entire weekend. Let’s just say it was one of my harder weekends at work. But I made it through and made a doctor’s appointment for Tuesday bright and early.
Now I was originally diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 2010 by a doctor who worked as an arthritis and pain specialist. As i mentioned in my last blog post, he prescribed me two medications. One prescription was illegible but the one I could read turned out to also be used as an antidepressant and i didn’t feel like risking the side effects. To this day I have not been using a doctor recommended form of treatment. Just yoga, acetaminophen and willow bark for the pain. Lately i’ve realized that maybe that’s just not enough. I need to be able to use my wrist and considering i’m going on week 2 of pain, I need a solution fast.
So I met with a doctor at University Health Services and explained to her that I needed blood work done to be absolutely 100% positive this was indeed fibromyalgia so that I could in turn take the appropriate course of treatment to manage it and keep it in check. She understood my desire for a medical plan that did not involve former antidepressants as treatment. So she drew a bunch of blood and prescribed me anti-inflammatories. Her theory is that my body is producing too many inflammatory cells and sending them to my joints. I’m supposed to take them for 2 weeks and see if they help. In the event that they do, she wants me to stop taking them and if the problem persists, I will be sent to a specialist to determine why my body is sending so many inflammatory cells throughout my body.
Now because my wrist isn’t what it should be, I went and bought myself an Ace bandage to help minimize movement and reduce pain by stabilizing my wrist.
It’s interesting to see how people react to me now. Most people just stared at my brace and made comments like “you’re a woman of many talents” when i still managed to balance 3 plates. Only a few brave souls have been bold enough to ask me what happened, many exclaiming upon my explanation “aren’t you a little young for that?” To which i reply “yeah but i’m like a 75 year old woman trapped in a 22 year old body” and everyone laughs…. but i’m not even kidding. I literally feel like this old creaky body struggling to get up the stairs or even out of bed in the morning. One of my coworkers told me Sunday it breaks his heart to see me like that because usually we just joke around about my fibromyalgia when i’m really feeling it after a long day but seeing the brace on my wrist “made it all so real.”
Who knew that this simple black bandage could affect the way people perceive my ailment. I’m wearing a knee brace most days but since people can’t see it, it doesn’t exist to them. Something can’t be real if it doesn’t exist, right?
The female body in crop tops
Crop tops. I love the way they look and everything else about them. But I am too shy to wear them, without a camisole underneath that is. I can wear them when I’m at home, but when I leave the door I feel like I have to cover up. Why do I feel this way? It’s not like I’m uncomfortable in my own body, it’s just that I’m afraid to go out in my crop tops because I feel that I will be judged merely on my appearance. I look at other women wearing crop tops and admire them for being confident enough to show their skin. I was watching an episode of Trendy or Trashy that brought up a lot of questions, they basically react to crop tops, and while all of the men said crop tops were trendy, it left me feeling…weird. Why should a woman be judged by the clothes she is wearing? And people always tell others that shirts such as crop tops that show your midriff only look good people that have “abs,” Also in the video, they always mentioned how much skin was exposed through the tops, and whether they found it acceptable or not.
In the show, a man and a woman, I don’t know there names, look at crop top designs on women and feel they have the authority to say whether she looks good in the shirt. I was watching the video out of curiosity, however, I came to realize that we tend to think that women can be controlled and that we can decide what they wear. Why can’t women just wear whatever they want on their own bodies? I don’t know, I just found it kind of annoying. As long as you are comfortable in your own body, wear them.
What the F*** Is Your Problem
People come in all shapes and sizes and manufacturers that created planes were well aware of this. Even if they were not aware when the first plane was made it is now 2013 and they know damn well that not everyone is going to sit comfortably in those seats. This is a money thing, that’s all it will ever be about. It is reported now that those who are deemed overweight must pay for two plane tickets rather than one since they will take up two seats and therefore cause there to be one less seat for someone else. For some reason I am a little torn because I do not think people should have to pay two tickets. Although I do not agree with this I myself have experienced sitting next to someone who is unable to fit in one seat. Not only is it uncomfortable for them but it was also uncomfortable for me because I could feel their sweaty skin rubbing against my side. The fact that certain airlines are starting to implement this rule is somewhat degrading I think. This is not only telling someone that their too fat but it is also letting other passengers know that the person was deemed too fat to fit in a single seat. All of this is just bringing attention to the person that more than likely they do not desire to have. Here is my question though: How do these airlines determine whether someone is too big to fit into one seat? I’m sure that they do not have the right to weigh them and they don’t ask how much you weigh when buying a ticket!! I just think planes should be altered so that they have at least three seats in which someone who is overweight can fit comfortably and only have to pay for one ticket instead of two. Some people have no control over their weight and I don’t believe that they should have to pay for it emotionally and physically
Unruly Bodies 